May 17, 2011

Drama: A History, Part 4 - Final Installment

Initially, when the decision was made to shut down the business, I felt like my parents were waiting for me to come up with some great idea in order to save it.  Then mom bluntly stated several times that she was ready for it to be over.  That dad shouldn't waste his time going from bank to bank or consider another partner or anything to make it work.  She was all for shutting down and moving on... It didn't register though... She was in denial.  Big time.

Things began dragging on.  Mom and dad told me they didn't feel comfortable with MIL there anymore, so I told her that I would bring the girls to her house from now on, but she said she would just come to my house once a week.  (This I allowed because my MIL really isn't the problem, although she can be difficult to deal with, the real problem is with my mom and sister).  She said that it was a relief because planning the lunches and feeding everyone (which I never asked her to do in the first place), was overwhelming and now she could just concentrate on the girls.  Amen.

My mom then got jealous because MIL got to come out to my house and that would be heaven for my mom.. to come out to my house and have free rein, inviting sister over, and destroying the place while I am at work.... I don't think so.  She remained jealous because I insisted that the girls still come to the office with me, hence she had to come too.  (although, clearly it's a double edged sword).  This back and forth volley continued until the beginning of May, when I went down to two days a week. 

All the while, sister and mom would stir the pot almost everyday.  There were times when mom would just break down crying because her life is "being sold at auction" or "what are we going to do with the plants???"  or "who's going to take this bookshelf??? I just don't know who will take this bookshelf!?"  She would want to know who was on the phone every time it rang or tell dad, "so and so is here" but really it was someone totally different and she didn't know who it was.   Her cell phone would ring off the hook, my sister calling, and she would take it outside as if it was all a big secret.

The emotional roller coaster with dad was hard too.  Someone would do something nice for him, like write off a remainder of debt, or let him use equipment free of charge and he would cry.  That was extremely hard.  Then mom would, somehow, make it all about her. 

Sister decided that she would start doing her 'work from home job' at the office (translated: they didn't pay their internet bill and it got turned off) so she would come by with the boys every chance she got.  And it was total chaos.  The boys would tear through the office, jumping off desks, slamming doors, using the intercom on the phones, making a mess of the kitchen and so forth.  There were a couple of times when I loaded up the girls and left.... Left for an hour or two.  I would get back and everyone would be all pissy because I left.  They knew full well why I left, but I was the bad guy for actually leaving. 

I kept telling Jeff that it was just a little while longer.  That I was only hanging on to get a paycheck, but even I started to doubt those words.  I also had a different motive:  I wanted to see if BIL was going to PAY FOR THE CAR that I offered to buy and dad refused.  The car that got ripped out from under me to give to him.  The car that was kept nice and clean when I had it that now reeked of cigarette and is completely trashed.  That car.  Dad low balled it and told BIL that he would take $5000 for it.  This was back in January.   I waited patiently.  One by one most everyone found a job.  One by one, they all dropped like flies. 

In the middle of April, BIL got offered another job to start in the beginning of May.  And, let me just add, that there were some weeks that dad didn't take home a paycheck.  He barely had enough to keep the utilities on, BUT you better believe that BIL never.ever.missed his paycheck.  And even though we didn't have the money sometimes, I would always take one too.  Of course, my check was lucky to be a third of the amount his was. 

So, one day in April, I went in and was more making conversation than anything and asked mom, did we get any money in? (you know because she knew the ins and outs of the entire business) and she replied, "well, I know BIL gave your dad money for the car."  I went immediately to my computer and saw a deposit for $2400.  Yep.  It's not $5000, but at least it's something!  As if knowing that I would question the amount, my mom came into my office and said to me out of the blue, "I guess he is going to make payments for the rest."  YEAH. RIGHT.  I think we all know the truth there. 

Then dad comes to me a couple of days later and says, "so how are we looking?  Are you pretty much done with financials?"  I said yes.  He says, "well then we'll see how the next week goes and go from there." 

Translation:  You're done.  Within the next week, I was down to two days a week.  Believe me, it's fine by me, but it's the abruptness of it all.  He did the same thing when I was pregnant.  When the breeze blows, he goes with it and you just have to be ready.  Well, I was.  I knew from experience and I was ready. 

So my MIL is still coming once a week and I told my mom that she could watch the girls once a week covering the two days that I go into the office.  Of course, the dramatically reduced baby time for my mom and the reality that the we were going out of business was enough to send her straight to the doctor for anti depressants.   Which, she constantly talk about.  I think medicine is a wonderful thing, as Jeff is on some, but to tell everyone all the time is just drama.  But let me be frank: That's her problem.  Dropping the girls off for a couple of hours and not having to actually talk much to her is totally do-able. 

I am happy.  And if you could see me making the gesture to close a book, I am. This chapter in my life is closed and I am onto a great one, I am sure.


~Hollie said...

I sure hope that you find a NEW and BETTER life just around the corner. Sometimes, too much involvement with family can be a detriment. Glad you are moving on....

Lost in Space said...

I am so glad you are away from all that drama and ready to move on with the next chapter. I think this next one will be so much better...

strongblonde said...

omg. that is so not a healthy environment! i'm so glad you're out of there (sad about what it meant to your family, but happy that you have the chance for a change).

maybe the drama will ease up a bit??

how are you and sister related in birth order?

Kahla said...

Drama is right, I would have gone crazy long ago! On to bigger and better things for you!!!

St Elsewhere said...

Oh Chelle, you know what? You should write an epilogue! As in after six months from today, talk about who is where now.

I think your Mom and Sister would still be singing shop in Whineland.

You have been through a horrific time, really! What stress!

No more. No more.

lifeasdescribed said...

ooooh! I love that ending Chelle! Excited about your new adventures. :)

bumpy journey said...

I am so glad that part of your life is over. On to the next thing! Geez- I wish it could be different. Uh.